So THIS is real life D/s?!?!?!

i am now in my first real life, not-just-sex, D/s relationship and i honestly feel like i could explode from the ecstasy and bliss i feel from it!

Master Todd is an amazing man...He has these incredible eyes and way of looking at me...making me feel like He is reaching deep into my heart, my mind...it actually bothered me the first few times we were together because i have never had ANYone show that much interest and desire in knowing me before...i felt exposed, vulnerable and raw when He would look at me initially...i LOVED it and HATED it at the same time...really struggled with wishing He would be a jackass DOM so that i could just dismiss Him from my heart and focusing on submitting sexually. Master Todd will NOT let that happen! He would rather i submit to Him emotionally, over sexually ANY day..granted we BOTH love the sex! LOL But, if i were to withhold emotionally from Him, i know that we would never enjoy sex like we do, i would never enjoy submitting to Him as much as i do, and quite honestly, i don’t think there would be a future for us. i have a lot of intimacy and trust issues and tend to withdraw or remain distant emotionally—finding it quite simple to sexually submit since i easily disconnect emotions from what my body experiences…well, usually i do…with Master Todd, i like Him SO much, feel so safe, so loved, so wanted that I find it VERY difficult to push down emotions…i am grateful that He refuses to allow me to revert to my old habits of pushing down any emotions i have and just submitting sexually...i am glad He REFUSES to allow me to sexually service Him at times when He knows i am using it to avoid expressing feelings i may be having.

With Master Todd, i am thoroughly enjoying ALL aspects of submission—i LOVE making Him a cup of coffee, LOVE cooking for Him, LOVE helping Him around the house, LOVE just serving Him in daily life...with other DOMs, i have resented expectations of submission outside the bedroom…not that there ever was much opportunity for submission other than sexually in those relationships…but i never WANTED to serve them other than sexually…just didn’t care enough about the other DOMs to do so. With Master Todd, i CRAVE it…

Being with Master Todd makes me a better sub, a better person and the only reason for that is because He is such a good Master, such a good man. i really feel blessed and privileged (and more than a little undeserving!) to have Him in my life.